Almost Grown Up

Apparently drug dealers are now using snapping turtles to protect their drug stashes.

Who knew?

Since I don’t have time to post this morning, I leave you with this funny video, courtesy of Alynbdabear.

I’ll post later (really!).

This is the kind of ignorant nonsense that makes me mad. I mean, Mr. DeBord is entitled to his opinion on the military or anything else, but the article really makes three points: (1) DeBord obviously has no idea how someone gets military awards nor does he respect the sacrifices involved with military service; (2) DeBord has no idea that there are regulations that spell out exactly what General Petraeus has to wear when he appears before Congress (which includes all his “martial bling”); (3) DeBord is obviously a moron.

*End angry rant*

So, as many of you know, La has stopped blogging, perhaps permanently. I think I had gained a certain amount of comfort in being able to read her thoughts every day. I guess I’ll just have to ask her dogs to read her diary. First I suppose I’ll have to teach them how to read. Her blogging will be missed though.

My running has been going well (gearing up for an ultramarathon and a few marathons in the fall) and I’ve found that it’s the perfect way to learn about my neighborhood. I just take off with my ipod and my watch and weave through the streets and see how it all fits together. It’s relaxing AND informative. AND I’m a dork.

I hope everyone’s week has started off as great as mine has! And my sincere apologies to any Yankees fans out there. The better team won this weekend, that’s all.

PS: I was overwhelmed by the responses to the sock question, and feel now that I couldn’t have made a correct decision unless I changed my outfit or bought brown socks on the way to church. I ended up going sockless, which I thought to be the lesser or two evils. Never again will I allow this to happen.

This site makes me laugh. Very politically incorrect, but if you’re ok with that type of humor, check it out!

Since I don’t have time to post until after work today, I leave you with some musical stylings that will have you rolling on the floor. My thanks to This Fish for finding this gem. Caution: Due to the language, this is not safe for work.

After a somewhat busy/stressy day yesterday, I finished up early, watched some previews for upcoming movies, read about scary gnomes terrorizing South America, went for a nice long run, and had sushi with a friend. Not a bad end to a day.

I picked up this idea from Alyndabear, so here we go with the rules:

* Pick fifteen of your favourite movies.
* Go to IMDB and find a quote from each movie.
* Post them here for everyone to guess. (Don’t guess on all of them though, I’ll get suspicious).
* Strike it out when someone guesses correctly in the comments, and put who guessed it and the movie.
* No google, IMDB or blog archiving!
*When there is dialog, the first speaker is “A”, the second is “B”.

So here are my 15:

1) You want to know how I did it? This is how I did it: I never saved anything for the swim back. Nice answer by Each! Gattaca! An amazing movie.

2) A: Making a few friends, huh?
B: I wouldn’t say friends. I’m a convicted murderer who provides sound financial planning- it’s a wonderful pet to have. Sara got this one! Shawshank Redemption! Which is also my favorite movie.

3) You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it’s me, I’m a little fucked up maybe, but I’m funny how, I mean funny like I’m a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I’m here to fucking amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny? Mel got this one! It’s Goodfellas, though she identified the wrong scene (it’s actually the dinner scene). Still a great movie.

4) Well, I’ve been listening to my gut since I was 14 years old, and frankly speaking, I’ve come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains. La got this one (though apparently it was a photo finish). High Fidelity it is!

5) A: A real woman could stop you from drinking.
B: It’d have to be a real BIG woman.

6) I don’t eat shellfish. Mom always says, “Don’t ever eat nothin’ that can carry its house around with it. Who knows the last time it’s been cleaned.” She should know. Each got this one too! Drop Dead Gorgeous, a hilarious movie. Lacey Bean knew it too, and I’m putting her up because more people should realize how funny this movie is.

7) You Americans don’t smoke anymore. You live long, dull and uninteresting lives.

8 ) There is no normal life, there’s just life, you live it.

9) Does Aunt Ginny have a barn? We can hold the trial there. I can sew the costumes. Maybe his Uncle Goober can be the judge.

10) A: Dad, why is the American government the best government?
B: Because of our endless appeals system. Magda pulled this one out (after just missing #4). Thank you for smoking!

11) Wow, you’re fast. I’m glad I caught up to you. I waited 5 hours for you. Why is your coat so big? So, good news - I saw a dog today. Have you seen a dog? You probably have. How was school? Was it fun? Did you get a lot of homework? Huh? Do you have any friends? Do you have a best friend? Does he have a big coat, too? Blue got it! It’s Elf!

12) The mood is tense; I have been on some serious, serious reports but nothing quite like this. I uh… Ching… King is inside right now. I tried to get an interview with him, but they said no, you can’t do that he’s a live bear, he will literally rip your face off. Blue got this one too! Anchorman it is!

13) Son, in 35 years of religious study, I have only come up with two hard incontrovertible facts: there is a God, and I’m not Him. Sara gets another one! Rudy! Why would you be embarrassed? This is a wonderful movie. B2G guessed this was Memento, which is incorrect, but which might be the correct answer for a quote that hasn’t been identified yet (hint, hint).

14) We’re sorta like 7-Eleven. We’re not always doing business, but we’re always open. Each was on quite the roll this morning. This movie is, of course, Boondock Saints.

15) I have to believe in a world outside my own mind. I have to believe that my actions still have meaning, even if I can’t remember them. I have to believe that when my eyes are closed, the world’s still there. Do I believe the world’s still there? Is it still out there? Yeah. We all need mirrors to remind ourselves who we are. I’m no different. Alyndabear gets this one! It’s from Memento. She also gets credit, once again, for giving me this great idea.

Apparently there is an item called a “Safe Banana” which is used for transporting a banana around without it becoming damaged. You can buy these online. I don’t even know what to say.

Does anyone else notice a LOT of stories about people fabricating memoirs as of late?  It seems like every month, another bestselling novel about someone’s epic life turns out to be fake (Question: wouldn’t these books sell just as well if marketed as a novel inspired by a person’s life, without any of the media backlash?).

My favorite recent story? A decade (!!!) ago, Misha Defonseca wrote about how during the second world war the nazis forced her from her home and she hiked 1900 miles across europe with a pack of wolves (Note: how did it take a decade for people to figure out something wasn’t quite right about this? I figured it out when I read that the plot involved a young girl adopted by wolves during wartime). As it turns out, the entire story was fake.

These stories bug me for some reason. This interesting article talks all about some recent examples. But really. Does saying something is real make it so much better? Does it sell better? Is there really a benefit? If a book is a beautiful piece of writing, do you need to lie in order to sell it?

Thoughts? Comments? Anyone actually spend their childhood with a pack of wolves?

So when I saw this headline on Slate I was intrigued: The Texas Dildo Massacre. The article is about a 5th Circuit case that ruled Texas’ ban on sex toys to be unconstitutional. An interesting read if you like law stuff. If not, you can still laugh at the title.

Three posts today? I know! The last two are just half posts though (and I need to make up for not posting again yesterday).

It’s a proud day for the US Navy, who last night shot down a spy satellite that might have fallen to Earth next month (I’m not being sarcastic, I think this is pretty cool).

Some of you might question the logic of spending 74 million dollars to shoot down something that had almost no chance of hurting a single person. However, blowing up a satellite from a boat is something little boys dream of doing when they’re growing up, so let us have our fun.