Almost Grown Up

So in the vast craziness that is getting ready to take a few days off and visit the fam, I was stressed.

It means getting ahead on my work, so that nothing implodes while I’m gone.

It means talking to clients so that they know I still love them and will be dealing with their problems upon my return.

It means finishing the extra project that I stupidly picked up early because I won’t be in the office the day it is due.

It means doing laundry, packing a suitcase, packing a car with things to take home, and getting enough caffeinated beverages to keep me from falling asleep while driving home.

Glorious.

So I got home at nearly 8pm, after a 13 hour day and started working. I looked at the clock twice and was sad that I didn’t have any time to run. So I packed, and I shuffled things around, and then it hit me:

“I really need a run.”

So off I went, and the second my feet hit the pavement I felt better. The sun was down, the heat was drifting away, the air was getting all sweet (this “sweet evening air” I speak so much about is apparently due to night blooming jasmine, I am told, at least I’m not about to have a seizure). And I felt better. I came home, ate the leftover food from my roommate’s date (He’s cooking for her now! Quite the big step!) and settled in for a night of packing.

My neighbor swung by shortly thereafter so she could get my help with a moving project of her own, and said to me “Everytime I see you you’re doing something, you have such a wild, interesting life.” And you know what? My life is great. Even when the job is tedious, I love it. I love my job and my coworkers and doing what I do every day. I love the social aspects of my life here, be it beer with the guys or soccer with the team from work. Even on the long days, the 13 hour days that have me dragging ass back home and looking longfully at my bed, I love what I do.

So, the other good part about my impending return to New England, is that I can watch the Red Sox play (haven’t worked out how to do this in Virginia yet). So in honor of my getting to watch the Sox, I’m reposting a poem written in the Sporting News on September 21, 1911, two weeks before the last game of Cy Young’s career:

HE’LL BE PITCHING STILL
On the morning of the Judgment, when friend Gabriel calls the game,
He’ll be somewhat disappointed when he cries one famous name;
For in all those countless legions who will answer to the roll,
There will be one fellow missing and may peace be on his soul.
There will be one man too busy to come in and learn his fate;
He’ll be working while the others try to horn in past the gate;
For when Gabriel toots his trumpet and we all rise from the hay,
Old Cy Young will not be present – he’ll be pitching ball that day.

(Yeah, I have issues with the baseball craziness, at least I’m not one of those murderous yankees fans).

So, I’ve been pretty bad at posting this last week. There are a lot of reasons for that, and none of them very good. However, I have been thinking a lot about why I started writing here, and where I want this little project to go from here.

I started writing at a pretty hard time for me personally, and I was living a pretty transient existance. Over the time I’ve been writing I’ve shifted into my routine. So while my life is by definition kind of in flux constantly, I’m more settled now. I go to work Monday-Friday, I go to church on Sunday, run 5 days a week, etc. It’s easy to get into a rhythm with all the things life throws at you, and that’s what I’ve been doing, and it has reflected on here.

You see, at some point, I let this stop being entertaining. From time to time I really spent some time writing something more involved, but I felt this imaginary pressure to write something every day. Where did this come from? I don’t know. Somewhere in my mind I cooked up this pressure. Some blogs I read are capable of churning out day after day of interesting posts. I’m not, I lose some of my zing when things start to feel like a chore. Which is what this became. Right in there with drafting documents at work and doing laundry, I had one other thing to check off the list each day. I can’t imagine it was fun for any of you to read, and it certainly wasn’t fun for me to write.

So then last week I wrote a long post about my weekend, and the tornadoes that hit this area, and all the summery things coming up. I hadn’t written in a few days, and I had fun writing it. I really did. And from the responses, both here and those emailed to me, you all had a bit more fun reading it (which is good). So that sort of kicked my ass a bit, and caused me to rethink how I go about writing on here.

The moral of this story? I’ll be posting a bit less often. I want to really enjoy writing this, so I’ll post when I have things to say. Life is still constantly changing for me, and I have lots of adventures coming up in the next few months (including my birthday, you should all start picking out gifts now), so it should be a fun season and a good time for a fresh start (Five months in and I already need to restart, what does that say about me?). I’m also going to get much better at reading all the wonderful things that you are writing, because my google reader has been higher than I would like since I moved here, and it’s time to dive back in there.

Let the games begin.

“You might want to head down to the basement, they just spotted a tornado half a mile from here.”

Excuse me while I flip out.

So down into the basement we went. I honestly didn’t know we had one (a basement, not a weather system that threatens my life) before today. It smells funny, and as I descended into the poorly ventilated nether regions of my building, I had but one thought:

“I hope my car insurance will cover my car getting blown away.”

Perhaps I started too late in the story, lets back up.

Last week was long. I was tired almost every night. Beat. By the weekend I was ready to collapse. My “powernap” of Friday afternoon stretched for hours. Lying under the sheets, staring blearily at my alarm clock every 30-45 minutes and then resetting it.

Going out was not on the agenda.

When I say I was “tired,” most of you won’t be able to picture how useless I actually was. This is really tired. I’m basically worthless at this stage. Conversation lags, thoughts die, I dream of bed. But it was a friend’s birthday, so I cowboyed up (to all non-Red Sox fans, I apologize for the reference) and headed out.

I’ve decided that one of my favorite summertime (it’s warm here, I refuse to believe it will get warmer) activities is sitting at an outdoor bar, having a beer with friends. Even though I went home early, I felt at peace while I was there. The warm air mixed with the good conversation and the taste imported beer that I couldn’t even pronounce the name of. The sweetness of the air in the evenings mingles with the salt off the ocean and the warmth of the people crammed into a small area after a long week. I think my goal for this summer is to recapture that feeling as much as possible, because it really was amazing. I went home early and collapsed into a comatose pile in my bed and didn’t move until morning (minus one incident when roommate and friend stumbled in sometime after last call).

Saturday was a perfectly lazy day. A run when it was far too hot to run (ugh), some quality time watching a movie I had been meaning to get to since I received it as a gift two months ago, and a house party that we threw. It was nice. Low key, but friendly. A nice night, and while I might not remember it in a year, it was certainly nothing momentous, it was exactly what I needed at the time.

Of course, Sunday had to come, after a night spent tossing and turning under the covers, unable to sleep. And I felt under the weather, and morose. The air in Church didn’t move. The sky threatened rain all day. Other things happened too. Exchanges I won’t write about here, not yet, probably not ever. It was dreary. I fell asleep around 7:30 and just slept.

If I haven’t mentioned it before, I hate Mondays. The beginning of the week always makes the next weekend seem too far away. Plus the office was a nightmare. Clients and files and the hopes of a productive day mixed and swirled and got lost in the storm of a big changeover in employees. By the time I arrived back from a meeting this afternoon I was happy to be able to close out a few files so I could pretend to salvage some productivity from an annoying day, a day which saw me get really angry for the first time in a long time. The ineffectiveness of everything going on around me just wore me too thin. And then came the exchange we started with.

“You might want to head down to the basement, they just spotted a tornado half a mile from here.”

Standing around in the basement, waiting for an all clear, was tense. The wind would whip wildly, moaning against the building, and then fall silent. The rain would pour down so loudly it echoed through the earth, and then it would stop. A mixture of faraway sounds, sirens, and whispers had us straining our ears to hear what was happening outside. Suddenly the tension fell from the room, I don’t know what did it. We all laughed and joked about what was happening outside, and it was suddenly nice to be in the semi-lit basement, breathing in the stale air and just laughing. It was almost a let-down when we got the all clear and filed out to go home.

Leaving work I saw the signs of what we missed. Trees were uprooted and split open a quarter mile down the road. The streets were flooded and the power was still flickering on and off in the 7-11 I stopped at for a bottle of water. As I stood in line I watched the woman behind the counter ringing people up. The power would flicker, she would grimace, and then she would smack the register with her hand before she continued ringing up the order.

And I giggled under my breath. Tomorrow’s another day.

Sorry for the absence. Yesterday I was going to write about the last few days, but I wasn’t feeling very good at all. A big post is due sometime after work today. Just wanted you all to know I’m still alive.

Yesterday was a looooooooooong day. Between finishing work late, fitting in a run, and then doing all the errands I needed to finish up, it was 9pm before I was eating dinner. Great. Training is coming along well though. I’ve bumped up my mileage with only a few more aches and pains, and feel myself getting into pretty good shape.

So, sometime this week or next (it could be as soon as today!) I’ll have an important meeting, that will likely decide how the next 4 years of my life will go. And that’s just weird. I mean, my situation has been so fluid for so long it’ll be good to actually have a plan, but knowing exactly what will happen is a little scary? Perhaps I’ve gotten used to not knowing. The suddenness of this change has been pretty crazy too. So stay tuned for the road map I’ll be getting.

Off to what will hopefully be a productive day where I get tons of stuff done. Fingers crossed.

Apparently drug dealers are now using snapping turtles to protect their drug stashes.

Who knew?

So this is my 100th post. I really kind of wished I had something deep or meaningful to say. Unfortunately, as of late, I’ve had a bit of writer’s block. Not a huge deal, I think it’s partially due to the lots of work and the resulting lack of energy I’ve been feeling. I need a weekend where I can sleep until noon, rather than one where I’m up running errands at the crack of dawn. Hopefully this weekend will be just what I need, though I’m feeling alright today with last night’s giant night’s sleep.

So, in honor of my writer’s block (suggestions anyone?), I thought I’d post a recap of where things stand now, at the 100 post mark:

The Apartment: Is beautiful, I love it. I have a few things that are getting shipped to my parents house to be stored based my having no idea how to read a floor plan, and I still need a second bookcase and the giant tv (Hi! Maybe turn on my paycheck sometime soon? That would be great, thanks), but I’m having a good time.

Life here: I’m getting used to life here. I wonder sometimes if I should have picked a slightly different neighborhood. There’s a weird mixture of people here (which makes traffic horrible) and the aforementioned lack of quality Chinese food concerns me. However, this is the south, and there is great BBQ! And given my love for anything with BBQ sauce on it, I should be ok. The neighbors are generally nice though, even if there is a little dog somewhere who thinks it is his job to wake me in the middle of the night by barking ferociously. I’m sure he’s scaring something off that would have otherwise killed me.

La: Is coming! Next weekend! We haven’t seen each other since I got here, and it has been hard, so this will be really great. Can’t. Wait.

Work: Great, but busy, and not without its annoyances (see paycheck, missing). I love the job, and I love my coworkers, which is a lot better than other jobs I’ve had (someday remind me to tell you all why you shouldn’t apply for college internships with a girlfriend if there is any chance of you breaking up).

Friends: My friends here are almost all work friends. Some I work with directly, some a little more indirectly. But I have one non-work friend here. It’s a different balance than I’m used to, but I think I’m also not used to working with people who I really enjoy hanging out with. Perhaps it’s just a matter of getting used to a new work/life balance. I’m going to try to get involved more in my church, which will help me branch out a bit socially.

How is everyone else doing?

Since I don’t have time to post this morning, I leave you with this funny video, courtesy of Alynbdabear.

I’ll post later (really!).

I love running, but this heat is killing me.

I can only describe the air this week as “warm and sweet.” I hope that makes sense to some of you, it seems like a natural way for me to describe it. That’s how it strikes me as I run. Warm and sweet.

The runs? Have been tough. The heat might have something to do with it.

However, I’ve been dragging in general. Tired, useless in the evenings. Is anyone else having this problem? Is it the heat? The change in my schedule? Just working too much? How do you fix such a problem? Anything anyone has? B-vitamins? Caffeine?

Thank you in advance for your input.

This weekend was nice. Exactly what I was looking for. Friday night was an early dinner with friends and early to bed. Saturday was (unfortunately) started far too early by my agreeing to help some friends out with errands. You should never have to wake up before 10 on a Saturday. Waking up before 6:30 should be a crime. The rest of the day Saturday, and all of today, were really nice though. Lots of relaxing, a few runs, Church, errands, etc.

How was everyone else’s weekend?

Every morning I drive past an old woman hula-hooping in the median of the road.

I don’t know why, but I felt you all needed to know that.

I love my job. I really do. I think that’s important to note up front. I like the work I do. I like the type of work I’ll start being given in a few months even more. I like that I get to help people with their problems. I like my boss. I like my boss’s boss. I like my coworkers.

Things I don’t like? I don’t like how tired I’ve been all week. I don’t like having to put in 12 hour days because someone didn’t figure out the scheduling correctly. I don’t like that certain weeks I’ll be on call and can’t stray far from the office. I don’t like that I’ll be moved to another office, possibly in another state, in the next 2-3 years, and that I’ll probably spend 6 months overseas next year. It just complicates life on so many levels.

But today? Was great. I’m exhausted after a late night (out! not in the office!) but I love Fridays. Hope you all have a wonderful weekend.